


You Didn't Stop Me/I Should've Stopped You

by phoenixserpens



Series: Post-Purgatory 2.0 [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Episode s15 e09 Coda, Episode s15 e09 The Trap, Happy Ending, Kissing, Light Angst with a Happy Ending, Multi, Purgatory, Spoilers, hand-holding, slight fix-it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-17
Updated: 2020-01-17
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:33:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22287949
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/phoenixserpens/pseuds/phoenixserpens
Summary: Cas heard Dean's prayer, but it wasn't all of what Dean wanted to tell him. This is also a bit of a fix-it coda for "The Trap" for Sam and Eileen.Basically these are the relationships of the episode but gayer and happier.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester
Series: Post-Purgatory 2.0 [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1610014
Comments: 4
Kudos: 96





	You Didn't Stop Me/I Should've Stopped You

**Author's Note:**

> Spoilers ahead for Supernatural Season 15, Episode 9, "The Trap." You have been warned!

“Dean.”

He spins around at his name, shotgun already cocked and aimed, and lowers it as he sees his best friend on the ground.

Cas stands up, and he’s bloody and his arm is held stiffly with claws marks over his bicep, but he’s _alive_.

Their hug is too tight, choking off Dean’s air, but it’s warm and it’s reassuring, and the breath he feels on his neck tells him that Cas is alive, and he made it even when Dean’s spent the last few hours stumbling in a daze.

An angel’s trap shouldn’t have been there, and the odds of the leviathans plotting revenge were astronomical, but they took Cas and Dean couldn’t stop them.

Cas’ earlier words ring in his ears. _“You didn’t stop me.”_

He had prayed to Cas, running through every time he had done it before in Purgatory, but he had prayed, and apologized, and cried over losing his best friend.

It wasn’t supposed to happen like this. He wasn’t going to lose Cas. At some point or another, _he_ would have fucked up. He would’ve been surprised during a hunt, the beers he drank at a bar while sifting for information would’ve made his reflexes too slow. He wasn’t supposed to lose Cas.

Cas was supposed to lose _him._

And the beautiful man in front of him is pulling a leviathan blossom out of his trench coat, remembering their mission even while fighting for his life and sacrificing himself to keep Dean safe.

Tears are running down his cheeks. He’s choking out an explanation, and that he prayed, but he’s stunned as Cas tells him that he knew. He heard Dean’s prayer.

Again, Dean’s life was put over his angel’s. Seven years ago, he was stuck following Cas when he didn’t want to be found, because he was protecting Dean from the beacon that shone out of his very existence.

And now, he sacrificed himself because it was safer for Dean to be left alone when the leviathans only wanted him.

Dean’s had a countdown clock running in his head with the timer, making himself mark the time where he could jump in the rift as late as possible. (He’s around 50 yards away from the rift, so he has to run to it when there are 14 seconds left. It gives him time to get over the uneven forest floor, with an extra 6 seconds for the leeway of rift-travelling.)

So he knows he has enough time to walk forward and grab Cas’s face and the back of his neck and crush his lips to his.

Cas gasps into his mouth, and Dean holds him there for a second before drawing back, stroking his thumb over Cas’s right cheek, mindful of the blood on his left.

Dean looks into Cas’s eyes, hoping to find him free of hate and anger, waiting for rejection but wishing for joy.

He hears a light scuffle, and he looks down to see Cas stuffing the blossom back into his coat. He feels a blush come on as he realizes that it may have been his overenthusiastic hug that squashed the flower.

There’s a moment where his heart drops as he drags his gaze back up to meet Cas’s, surely by now there would be a different reaction if it had been okay. He never wanted to make his angel uncomfortable, so he’s about to step back and apologize. He isn’t going to make an excuse, he only needs Cas to know his feelings. He won’t act on them if they aren’t reciprocated, but this is the lightest his heart has felt in years and it feels glorious.

Then his world spins, and Dean finds himself pressed against the tree where he found Cas slumped over, mirroring the position they had in the angel room back when the apocalypse hadn’t even happened yet.

They’re searching each other’s eyes. Years ago, blue had looked for understanding, and green had looked for a sign that death wasn’t incoming.

Now, it’s still blue looking for understanding, but green is open, conveying what cannot be said aloud.

Cas presses his lips to Dean’s in a sweet kiss that makes Dean melt and his eyes shut. He’s crying but now it’s out of joy, out of relief and happiness and the knowledge that his best friend, his angel, his salvation, won’t condemn him.

They break apart slowly, a hazy awareness of where they are taking over.

Dean doesn’t speak as Cas observes that he is still very much being followed, and that they should leave immediately.

They walk to the rift and when Dean’s hand bumps into Cas’s, he grabs it for a quick squeeze because he can, there isn’t anything to stop him.

He shoves Cas through the rift, breaking the memory that entangles him from seven years ago. His heart beats twice and he steps through the orange rift, emerging in the bunker where Cas is waiting. Dean turns and watches the rift close after one minute and seven seconds.

They mix the spell together, talking occasionally. The iron bands have released themselves from Dean’s chest and despite the lack of sleep, he’s feeling better than he has in weeks.

Where Dean once tried to caution Cas about the human concept of personal space, he says nothing when Cas stands too close to him and welcomes the hand on his shoulder to support him.

There are no rules for this. They head to the casino. Dean drives fast as always, and Cas is next to him in the passenger seat. There’s a hand on his knee and it keeps him grounded, even while walking into a trap where he knows his brother is being tortured by God himself.

When Eileen’s a puppet attacking him, and Sam refuses to use the spell, it’s all bearable. Dean’s heart has broken so many times for his little brother, but where he might have raged and screamed and cursed in the past, he remembers the pain of thinking that Cas was dead, and there wouldn’t be a body to find and bury, and that he hadn’t told Cas his feelings yet, and he takes a deep breath and just tells Sam that it’s okay, it’s enough for Sam to have gone with his gut.

The anger still simmers, but when Cas is next to him, it fades away until Dean can think clearly enough that he understands why Sam did what he did, and then it’s gone.

That night, they take turns showering and patch each other up. Dean grabs Cas’s hand and leads him into his bedroom. They’ve stolen a few kisses when Sam wasn’t around. In the car ride to the casino, they agreed not to mention it for a few days. Sam was surprised at their new camaraderie, but was distracted enough that he didn’t push it.

Cas follows Dean, closing the door behind him. In the light of the lamp, Dean sees the nervousness that he feels reflected on Cas’s face.

“We’re gonna sleep, okay?” Dean checks. “I just… I don’t want to be alone right now,” he finishes in a rush. There’s no way he can process what’s happened on his own, and Cas might be feeling the same way.

Cas nods. “Of course, Dean.”

Dean shudders, reminded of his prayer, and Cas, coming to the same conclusion, draws him in for a kiss, wrapping his arms around him. They pause for air and lean their foreheads each other while holding on to their hug.

Getting into bed and being met with a warm body makes Dean break, and he rushes into Cas’s arms. He cries again, soaking the front of Cas’s pajama shirt (one of Dean’s t-shirts). Cas rubs soothing circles into Dean’s back, and kisses the top of his head.

It’s almost unbearably sweet, but he feels a couple of tears drip onto his shoulder as Cas cries as well. Dean wraps his arms tighter around him, and squeezes him hard. He cards his fingers through Cas’s hair, messing it up but feeling Cas relax.

When they’ve both calmed and cried themselves out, Dean scoots up so he’s eye-to-eye with Cas.

“You know, Cas, you mean the world to me, and the next time I’m doing something stupid just tell me so I don’t hurt you again,” Dean says. It was hard to get out, but the promise to not be an idiot was formed from as soon as he had realized how he should have responded after blowing up at his angel.

Cas smiles at that, crinkles forming around his eyes. “I will, and I’ll always be here for you. Even if you’re doing something stupid.”

They still have their arms wrapped around each other, and Cas looks so happy that Dean blurts out, “I love you,”. Although he waited eleven years to say it, he wants to say it every day.

Cas simply replies, “I love you too,” and Dean could kiss him, so he does.

And then they look at each other and ask, “Sleep?” at the same time, so Dean turns off his lamp and ends up with his head on Cas’ chest and they hold each other tightly as if they’ll never let go.

Early in the morning, Dean wakes up to Cas stirring underneath his face. He picks his head up in time to see Cas’s eyes blink open, and a smile cross his face. Dean smiles back before thunking his head back down and moving a hand to hold one of Cas’s, and they fall asleep again.

Sam will never tell them that the reason Cas woke up was because he called Dean’s name when he opened the door to check on him. Seeing Cas was a surprise, but Sam rolled with it and returned to his room, and Eileen.

Eileen had come back to the bunker an hour after she had left, stating that even if things had been orchestrated by Chuck to cause a romance with them, she didn’t care. Sam had never done anything that she was uncomfortable with, and the genuine joy on his face when he looked at her made her happy, so if Chuck thought it would be funny or detrimental to have caused this, it didn’t matter to her, and it had backfired on him spectacularly.

They had kissed for a while after she finished speaking and went to sleep together. They had decided to take things slow and check in if anything seemed too intense or coincidental, but with everything that had gone down in the casino, it seemed only right that they could skip a few steps.

When Sam had gotten up the next morning, Eileen had woken up as well but stayed in bed while Sam checked on Dean. When he returned and told her about Dean and Cas, her resulting grin was brighter than the sun, and she hugged him hard enough that she felt his back pop. They followed Dean and Cas’s example and went back to sleep as well, and even though the day before had been awful, there had been a lot more good to come out of it than anyone expected.

**Author's Note:**

> This was rated T, I'm writing a continuation fic for Dean/Cas for this that is rated E, I'll have it up within the next day or so. I just wanted to get this out and make it seem closer to canon. :)  
> Let me know what you think, and how you liked the episode IRL!  
> I am emotionally damaged from this show, but I love it lol.  
> Love you <3


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